Freshly graduated, I moved back home and spent a year job hunting for the CS field I studied in, but to no avail. I got desperate and even considered sex work before, but even with my big, round ass I thought it was unattractive and disproportionate with my lankier body. I ended up working at a frozen yogurt store across the high school I went to, and was pretty miserable. The job was easy and a shitty income is.. kind of better than no income, I guess. My depression lowered my libido, and I lost most of my muscle definition. Any and all Grindr notifications were ignored because I felt bad "catfishing" guys with my outdated profile. But one slow summer day on the job, I got a Grindr notification that just said, (Name)? That really u? My heart dropped and I opened it to find an anonymous, blank profile with only his age at 47.
Who is this? I replied. Feelings of fear, confusion, and annoyance made my hands start to shake. I wasn't friends with anyone that age, and anyone I did know around that age were my parents' younger friends.
Don't remember your old coach? he replied, and sent a picture of himself. I recognized him immediately. His once young, energetic face was now.. gracefully aged. His smile lines were prominent and he had slight crow's feet; he used to have a bit of a rounder face but now it's a bit sharper and somehow more defined with slight stubble. Honestly.. He was really handsome, still. But, good looking or not, it was awkward to run into him on this app of all things.
Oh, wow! It's been a while. But, this is kinda weird no?
Yeah it's been a while. How r u? Sir. My ass is almost out and I've whored myself out on my profile.
I'm good. Again isn't this awkward for you?
Haha a little bit He replied. I was typing my reply out before I realized something. His profile was listed with the newer profiles. I deleted my reply and sent a new one.
Don’t you have a wife and kids? Why are you on here?
Used 2 she passed during covid. Kids r ok Oh. Fuck.
Oh I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to sound insensitive I’m just surprised is all.
NP u didnt know he replies. I just stare at my phone before I hear a customer clear her throat. I apologize and help check out her and her children. My phone buzzes as the last kid closes the door.
So what up? What r u doing back here?
Can’t find a tech job so I’m here at (frozen yogurt shop) now.
Dam that sux 🙁
Yeah but some income is better no income
Ya tru. So u been keeping in shape huh? 😉 My heart drops again at the mention of my appearance. I have no intention of hooking up, but I decide to just tell him.
Honestly these pics are from a few years ago. I’m a lot paler and skinnier now.
O rly? Dam not very healthy man I sigh and put the phone down. I know it’s not fucking healthy, but I’m just trying to get by every day. A few hours go by and aside from the mom and her kids, I serviced another one or two people. I started doing our usual mid-shift sweep, tidying up the place despite there being no trash. As I put the broom and pan back, I hear the jingle of our doorbell. “Welcome!” I shout out, and move to the front; when I get to the register my heart drops for the third fucking time. Standing in the doorway is my former coach. He just smiles at me and goes to get his frozen yogurt. I stare at him the entire time. He’s still toned like he was back then, a bit tanner, and he still had a carefree air about him that I admired back then. He came up to pay, and he gave me a familiar, warm, and bright smile. I just grinned and charged him, and he gave me a $50 bill. I looked up at him and shook my head, “No, I can’t. This is too much.”
“Come on, sport,” he said. His voice was still as animated as back then, just a bit more gravelly, “a one time thing from your old coach!” His emanating kindess was hard to fight against just like back then.I just smiled and took the bill. “Thanks, coach.” I told him, and turned to tidy up.
“Wait.” he stopped me, “Why don’t we just sit down and talk?” His words sounded warm and sincere, and it caught me off guard. I hadn’t been extended much kindness since coming back home, so I didn’t know how to reacf. But, as it was a slow day, I agreed and we sat down at a table.
The conversation was awkward at first what with him knowing what my body used to look like. I couldn’t look him in the eyes for a little bit. But as we went on, he opened up to me first, telling me about his wife and what his family went through. His kids were about to graduate from high school, and he was getting ready to explore himself again. I was touched by his vulnerability, and I told him about what I’d been through. I found myself tearing up, and tried to look away to hide from him. He placed a hand on my arm and I looked back, finding a sympathetic gaze. I broke down. Sobbing uncontrollably, and he just rubbed my arm while I was wailing about how I felt like I lost so much time. Aspirations gone and ambition wasted, I cried about how pathetic I felt and how I felt like there was something wrong with me. Finally, as I cried it all out, he handed me his napkin and I wiped whatever mess I had on my face. Looking up, I started to thank and apologize, but stopped when I saw him: he’d been crying silently alongside me. He wiped his own tears away and chuckled before teasing me, “Wow, you’re such a crybaby dude.” I laughed and looked towards the door; much time had passed and it was evening now.
“Well.. I think I’ve got to close up shop soon.” I told him, getting up.
“Damn, time passes by when you’re bawling your eyes out with coach!” he joked.
“Yeah.. It was.. Nice,” I began, “It’s been a while since I was able to talk to someone like that.”
“Yeah? Looks like I still gotta help you even after ya left me, punk!” he said, lightly smacking my arm.
“I appreciate it, uh, coach..?”
“You can call me (name) if you want. Coach works too.” he smiled. That bright smile was somehow more handsome this time around.
He stayed with me while I closed and we reminisced about the past. I told him about some of the other guys’ whereabouts and he was equally excited for everyone he heard about. As I locked the door, I turned and we clasped hands and pulled each other in for one of those shoulder tap hugs.
“Hey, if you ever need me, here’s my number.” he said, and gave me a crumpled piece of napkin with his phone number on it.
“Even for a booty call?” I joked, putting the napkin in my
pocket before getting my keys out.
“Well.. We’ll see.” he winked, and he turned away to get to his car. I felt my dick twitch from his comment, and felt the butterflies in my stomach. Was I into my old tennis coach? I watched him get in, and he waved to me before pulling out and driving off. I walked to my car and got in, pulling out my phone.
U ok?
Sry didn’t mean 2 offend. U probably look great
Hello? U there?
Is it ok if I come see u?
Coming over after practice
Kk coming
Persistent as ever. I smiled, remembering his ceaseless pep talk after any bad day, and how we always smiled because of him. I put his number in my contacts, and before pulling off I texted him: Hey coach